Frustration

Last Sunday, I woke up with a searing migraine and spent the entire day in agony. When I get these, some of the pain usually carries over into the next day, which it did. So on Monday I sent my coteacher a text message saying I would be late to school. I didn't see any point rushing into work on a day I wasn't even teaching when I was in pain. She texted back: "Don't worry, take your time." I took an Advil, waited for it to kick in, and came to work at 9:10. (I'm supposed to be there at 8:00am)

When I walked in, the Vice Principal called my coteacher over to her desk for a chat. They were speaking Korean, but I could tell something was up. Minjung told me afterwards that the vice principal was "really worried about me" and my health problems. I have been sick/late "several times," so she recommend I go to the doctor and get my migraines checked out so that they don't prevent me from missing work again.

I've learned enough about Korean passive-aggressive communication to know that saying they are "really worried about me" is a thinly disguised warning that I shouldn't miss work unless I am literally on my death bed. In Korea, when you are sick, you're supposed to go to the doctor, get medication, and come straight back to work. This mentality completely baffles me, because how can you be productive when you are in pain? Apparently, that's not the point. What's important is being physically present, regardless of whether or not you are doing any work.

I looked at Minjung in disbelief and said, "I've been sick one day in 4 and a half months." I told her that I didn't think coming late would be a big deal since this was the second week in a row I wasn't setting foot in a classroom. The kids were in the middle of finals and on test days, I usually sit at my desk for 8 hours a day with very little work to do. I really don't understand why it's so important for me to be sitting at my desk doing nothing when I could be at home getting better.

Another thing that frustrates me is that when I do get sick, my coworkers act like it's something I brought upon myself. They tell me I need to get more exercise, I need "proper nourishment," I need to rest, etc. I'm sorry, but I think that getting a few colds is normal in my situation. Four and a half months ago, I moved to an overcrowded city where I use public transportation on a daily basis; I'm exposed to a lot more germs here than I was back home. Also, I know my body; I rest when I'm fatigued, I eat when I'm hungry, and I use Purrell like crazy, since hot water in restrooms is scarce and when they do have soap, it's usually a bar that everyone shares.

In spite of my efforts, I still get sick sometimes, and I don't think I deserve to be scolded for it. Unfortunately, today, the following Monday, was one of those times. This morning I woke up at 3 am with the chills and my body ached all over. I thought I had the flu, so I waited in misery until 8:30 when the hospital opened to get tested. I did have a bit of a a fever, but the doctor wasn't quite sure what I had so he ran some tests and gave me a shot of pain medication. The tests didn't show anything serious, so he wrote me up for "fever, generalized muscle pain, headache, and acute pharyngitis (a.k.a sore throat/cold)" I had asked him, while trying to choke back tears, to write a note for my school because they get upset when I'm sick.

Sure enough, I got an e-mail from my coteacher tonight saying the vice principal is "really, really worried about me" and said "it's a bit too often that you come to school late or you cannot come to school because of your health problem. She said you need to make sure you stay healthy and rest enough on the weekends."

"A bit too often." Hmmm.... I did a little calculation to prove how absurd this statement is. I've been here 4.5 months, but I'm not counting the first two weeks because I didn't really start work yet. Let's say my total working days so far have been 115 (I knocked 5 days off of the total for Chuseok and other random days I didn't have to come in). Of 115 days, I've taken 2 sick days, been 1 hour late on the headache day, and 10 minutes late one day when I forgot to set my alarm. That amounts to less than 2% of my total working days. However, today was the only time that I was sick on a day that I was actually supposed to teach. So really, the total time my "medical problems" have actually interfered with teaching is .86%. One day. Absolutely ridiculous. I am not happy right now.

Also, since finals are over, the kids basically have playtime until the end of the semester, and I was going to teach them some Christmas songs. So you can see, my presence at work right now is less than crucial.

Tomorrow I have a high school teachers' seminar from 8 am to 9 pm, and I will go in spite of the fact that I will probably be miserable the entire time. Heaven forbid I take another sick day.